Научная статья на тему 'The need for belonging as a basis for development and growth'

The need for belonging as a basis for development and growth Текст научной статьи по специальности «Языкознание и литературоведение»

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Ключевые слова
ЧУВСТВО ПРИНАДЛЕЖНОСТИ / SENSE OF BELONGING / САМООЦЕНКА / SELF-ESTEEM / SELF-RELIANT / ОТНОШЕНИЯ / RELATIONSHIP / ФУНКЦИОНИРОВАНИЕ / FUNCTIONING / САМОСТОЯТЕЛЬНОСТЬ

Аннотация научной статьи по языкознанию и литературоведению, автор научной работы — Esther Behore

The article explains the meaning of the sense of belonging, because the man is a social being. Therefore, his actions are motivated by the need to feel that you belong to something. The article also explains what happens to a person when he has a good sense of belonging and vice versa. The sense of belonging is essential to a healthy person's soul, as air is essential to a living body. The sense of belonging can be achieved in positive ways or in negative ways. Every child belongs to his family from the day he was born, but the sense of belonging is determined by the relationship between parents and children. A high sense of belonging contributes to a sense of high self-worth self-confidence. The child's sense of belonging is influenced by the love he feels, the fact that he is desirable, useful and necessary. Be helpful in accordance with his ability, but above all let the child always feel that he is unconditionally loved: as you are all right.

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ЧУВСТВО ПРИЧАСТНОСТИ КАК ОСНОВА ДЛЯ РАЗВИТИЯ И РОСТА РЕБЁНКА

В этой статье раскрыт смысл чувства причастности и его важность в жизни, так как человек является, прежде всего, социальным существом. Поэтому его действия мотивированы необходимостью чувствовать свою причастность к другим членам общества. В статье показано, что происходит с человеком, когда он имеет сформированное чувство причастности, а так же показаны проблемы при его недостаточном развитии. Чувство причастности необходимо для души здорового человека, так как воздух необходим для живого тела. Чувство причастности может быть достигнуто позитивными или негативными способами. Каждый ребёнок принадлежит своей семье со дня рождения, но чувство причастности определяется отношениями между родителями и детьми. Высокое чувство принадлежности способствует чувству высокой самооценки, уверенности в себе. На чувство причастности ребёнка влияет любовь, которую он чувствует, понимание, что он желателен, полезен и необходим.

Текст научной работы на тему «The need for belonging as a basis for development and growth»

Culture-sensitive treatment

The therapeutic encounter with a client who collectively Eastern culture - authoritarian, patriarchal as traditional Arab culture, the analyst finds himself conflicted both personal and international level -visit with the values of Arab client with whom he met. The therapeutic encounter between an Arab client handles may arise misunderstandings and misinterpretations which has constituted a fundamental obstacle to the therapeutic relationship and therapeutic process that the therapist is planning. For example, the therapist keeps the emotional distance (as the silences) and anonymous relations with Arab client may be interpreted as indifference, uninterested or powerless. Customer relationship between the Arab handles are an encounter between two cultures. Therapist and psychological sciences, while the customer is fictional and physiological. In this meeting the therapist should decide between two approaches:

First, the metaphorical language translation - physiological, psychological language customer's own -aobiiktibit, then use Western treatment based on the analyst's therapeutic orientation. Second, adjust the metaphorical language of the customer -physiologist therapeutic intervention and to develop intervention techniques that match the customer's language .

Therapists practice in implementing interventions cultural sensitivity when handling client culture or a different ethnic group. Therapists should be close and accept the culture of their clients and take into account the cultural norms and values

Dwairy [5] in his book, Counseling and Psychotherapy with Arabs and Muslims: A Culturally Sensitive Approach indicates difficulties and challenges therapeutic encounter with a patient the classic Arab culture. Usually, these methods are ineffective and cause the therapist to experience disappointment with himself and the profession, and feelings of anger and accusations directed at the patient.

These difficulties are described below:

1. openness and sharing: Arab culture does not encourage exposure of personal and family matters outside the family.

2. Using the client mechanism "Mosairh" (described above) as a way to meet analyst expectations and want him as an authority figure. So that the customer avoids the expressions of anger and frustration towards the therapist.

3. The value of therapeutic dialogue: Arab individual normal discourse whose intent is to create harmony in front of the other, and not sharing personal suffering

Библиографический список / References

4. Dealing with emotions: in the Arabic people to behave in a socially expected of them, and the world of feelings is not in their consciousness. Arab patients react with surprise and astonishment very emotional state investigation.

5. Touch sensitive issues: an Arab patient may suspect the intentions of the borrower and relates handles sensitive topics, such as sex, family secrets or client relationships - treats. Which causes them to drop out.

6. conduct in an open and vague: Arab man exercise online environment that gives clear guidance to expectations of him. Handles allowing space for the patient may disappoint the Arab patients.

7. conception of time: from a widespread perception in the Arab concept of time, delays are natural living conditions and governing. The patient experiences an insult and humiliation due to the aggressive attitude of the therapist with the concept of time.

Krenawi [8] adds more difficulties in the therapeutic encounter with a patient evenings, for example, communication with patients Arab, claims that may be delays in the formal and impersonal because of social conventions, the patient's words are based on a complex system of metaphors and proverbs mode can cause flawed interpretations will lead to choosing techniques therapeutic not match the patient's culture and worldview .this reason for dropping out of treatment early. In addition to the passivity of patients who see the therapist as a guide and expect that they will explain the situation and offer them solutions.

Conclusion

The session with Arab clients who have adopted a collective personality should strive for the preservation of psychosocial integration between the individual and his family. The intervention should focus on and map the relationships and conflicts between the family rather than the individual intrapsychic conflicts. Western techniques cause serious obstacles to a meeting with Arab clients. Techniques such as identifying emotions, exposing family problems outside the family, discussing the issues of intimacy and sexuality.

Survival in Arab society depends on the relationship with the family is the only source exclusively for financial support, social, and emotional. Is contingent punishment and rejection for failure to comply with the norms. This includes a kind of barter, which includes support for giving up the right to self-expression and personal decision while alienating true feelings and desires of the individual. Maslow's terms exercisable only won four basic needs: physical needs, security, a sense of belonging and being loved and self-esteem at the cost of the highest need for self-actualization.

1. Dwairy M. Foundations of a psycho-social dynamic personality theory of collective people. Clincal Psychology Review, 2002; V. 22: 343 - 360.

2. Dwairy M. Counseling and Psychotherapy with Arabs and Muslims: A Culturally Sensitive Approach. New York: Teachers College Press, 2006.

3. Al - Haj M. Education among Arabs in Israel: control and social change. Jerusalem, Magnes publishing, 1996.

4. Arhard R., Klingman A. Consulting in - Book a changing society. Tel-Aviv: Ramot publishing, 2004.

5. Dwairy M. Personality, culture and Arab society. Jerusalem: Eleanor publishing,1997.

6. Smilanski M. Challenge adolescence, needs, stress and coping, Ramot Prees, 1991: 207 - 165.

7. Klingman A., Eisen R. .iiaotz psychological. Tel-Aviv: Ramot Prees,1990.

8. Krenawi A. Culturally sensitive mental health in Arab society. In Clare, (Ed) to be different in Israel: ethnicity, gender. Tel-Aviv: Ramot publish-ing,1999: 74 - 65: .

Статья поступила в редакцию 07.11.17

УДК 159. 9

Esther Behore, postgraduate, ULIM University (Universitatea Libera Internationale din Moldova)

(Chisinau, Republic of Moldova), E-mail: [email protected]

THE NEED FOR BELONGING AS A BASIS FOR DEVELOPMENT AND GROWTH. The article explains the meaning of the sense of belonging, because the man is a social being. Therefore, his actions are motivated by the need to feel that you belong to something. The article also explains what happens to a person when he has a good sense of belonging and vice versa. The sense of belonging is essential to a healthy person's soul, as air is essential to a living body. The sense of belonging can be achieved in positive ways or in negative ways. Every child belongs to his family from the day he was born, but the sense of belonging is determined by the relationship between parents and children. A high sense of belonging contributes to a sense of high self-worth - self-confidence. The child's sense of belonging is influenced by the love he feels, the fact that he is desirable, useful and necessary. Be helpful in accordance with his ability, but above all let the child always feel that he is unconditionally loved: as you are all right.

Key words: sense of belonging, self-esteem, self-reliant, relationship, functioning.

Эстер Бехор Савион, аспирант факультета социальной психологии, Университет УЛИМ

(Universitatea Libera International din Moldova), [email protected]

ЧУВСТВО ПРИЧАСТНОСТИ КАК ОСНОВА ДЛЯ РАЗВИТИЯ И РОСТА РЕБЁНКА

В этой статье раскрыт смысл чувства причастности и его важность в жизни, так как человек является, прежде всего, социальным существом. Поэтому его действия мотивированы необходимостью чувствовать свою причастность к другим членам общества. В статье показано, что происходит с человеком, когда он имеет сформированное чувство причастности, а так же показаны проблемы при его недостаточном развитии. Чувство причастности необходимо для души здорового человека, так как воздух необходим для живого тела. Чувство причастности может быть достигнуто позитивными или негативными способами. Каждый ребёнок принадлежит своей семье со дня рождения, но чувство причастности определяется отношениями между родителями и детьми. Высокое чувство принадлежности способствует чувству высокой самооценки, уверенности в себе. На чувство причастности ребёнка влияет любовь, которую он чувствует, понимание, что он желателен, полезен и необходим.

Ключевые слова: чувство принадлежности, самооценка, самостоятельность, отношения, функционирование.

«The most difficult disease today is not leprosy or tuberculosis, but the feeling that they do not need you.» (The nurse Theresa).

According to Adlerian theory, man is a social creature and therefore his actions are motivated by the need to feel a belonging that is part of an organization society or family. This is an innate need (an inborn need). Man is a social being, he needs a relationship, every person wants to find himself in society and the need to belong is the driving force of man in all his actions. Sense of belonging is a basic need of every person - an existential and emotional need. Man wants to feel equal among equals. To feel needed, loved, desirable, helpful, contributing, he wants to be accepted into every society he comes to. A person is needed all the time, all life to strengthen the relationship and feel safe with him. All of life man asks himself about his place, in every field. Do I have a place, do you accept me, and do you treat me! Man works in society among people and thus he achieves

his goals, all man's behavior is for the main purpose to be part of.....

Feel belong. We all need people, we are social beings. Any negative behavior is because of place and sense of value which does not exist.

It is not self-evident that a person who is born into a family has a sense of belonging, a biological belonging, but we are talking about a sense of belonging that needs to be worked on.

As I mentioned earlier, the sense of belonging is a basic and existential necessity

Of man, from the moment of birth throughout his life he aspires to belong. If the sense of belonging to society will be better, so his functions will be better. A sense of belonging can be achieved in positive or negative ways - everyone chooses the right strategy for him to realize this feeling. This need never comes to satisfaction; it is what motivates us to do. Belonging to a small child begins with doing something. Adler sees man as a holistic and indivisible entity. His claim that even before physical needs, the basic need is the need for a sense of belonging. Adler believed that man's behavior is purposed and the ultimate goal is belonging. The need not only to belong but to feel belonging is a topic that comes up at every step and stage from the birth of the baby to adulthood and in all the tasks of life (work and love and friendship). According to Adler, the sense of belonging reaches its peak when the individual views the family or society as an inseparable part of his being and sees himself as an inseparable part of the society's being.

A sense of belonging is as important to a person as air to breathe. Without air, the body will not exist - without a sense of belonging, the soul will not exist.

The person who feels belongs is a person who does what he can and is satisfied with what he does.

As the baby grows, he begins to explore the world. He crawls, touches, curiously checks every object, especially identifies the family, and even learns to distinguish them from strangers. When a child grows closer to one year old, he is able to understand that there are other people around him and he is learning to be considerate to them. He also begins to try to give something of himself - to understand what cooperation is, to wait a little while when mom is busy, from time to time to teach him to adapt to the needs of others, with the goal of learning what cooperation is. His belonging continues to develop, on the one hand, enabling him to maintain contact with the world around him, while on the other hand his parents continue to be the source of security and welfare. In this way, the infant successfully completes the initial stage which is so critical in building the sense of belonging.

So that the primary place that gives the child a sense of belonging is the family. To give that feeling you have to work on it, to give the child the feeling that he is loved, desirable, necessary, that he is an independent person with his own dignity. Not to insult him to criticize him, or to let the child feel miserable, not to ignore him, or to

make derogatory epithets, to devalue him, to ridicule/mock him ("Who is the idiot who puts the oil in the refrigerator?") to blame - If you had listened to me then...

A child who does not feel that he belongs, will check all the time and be busy with how he feels where he is, and then he would not be free to do/engage other tasks.

A child learns about his place, his value and his abilities through the eyes of the environment, and the initial environment is the family. If a child develops (in his development) a belief that he belongs, that he has a place and he has no doubts about his place in the family, that his parents love him even if he is not successful and not perfect - will feel so everywhere. He will grow up to be a self-confident person, a person who accepts himself as he is, and feels good everywhere. He will not be busy proving himself, will not seek for permits all the time that he is fine, and will be able to direct his energies to realizing his unique destiny in the world. A high sense of belonging contributes to a sense of high self-worth = self-confidence.

As the child grows, the parental role becomes more deliberate. Four elements can be identified that affect the sense of belonging: atmosphere, discourse, involvement and boundaries. 1. Atmosphere - is the background to what is going on in the house. Is there any pleasant at home? Is the relationship between the parents a reasonable relationship managed with mutual respect? Is there a harsh criticism, or there is a constant guilt among the residents of the house? All these have a good or bad effect on the sense of belonging. A child who feels a bad atmosphere will want to stay outside the house - with his friends, grandmothers and others, and at some point in adolescence he will choose other districts, far away and even dangerous to travel around. On the other hand, a child who feels pleasantly, with acceptance and respect among family members - will be a desirable and positive part and will feel a sense of belonging. Investing in a good atmosphere that includes investment in cleanliness order and aesthetics is actually an investment in creating belonging.

2. Discourse: is the way family members communicate with one another. Is it a flowing and open discourse? How conflicts are resolved in the family and are they discussed? Are there any shouts of how much? Are there explain differences of opinion? Is the child considered a partner in the discourse? Does he express his opinion on issues related to him, such as clothing, school friends etc. Is it possible to talk about feelings? Do they share it with family-related issues about crises such as a parent's illness or dismissal from a parent's job? Are there secrets in the family? Or talk to him about it according to his level of development and understanding, is there a constructive or harmful discourse, and whether it contributes to the sense of belonging or sabotages it

3. Involvement: Involvement is how the child feels shared/ participates and takes part in what happens at home, from household chores, from household maintenance and operation to partnership: to the happier and happier events. It turns out that the more the child gets, the more he will grow up to be a good and happy person - is an incorrect statement, the more the child contributes, takes part in the tasks of the house, partners with everyone and bears responsibility both on daily basis and in times of crises, involved and partner .The parents have the responsibility to harness the children from an early age to contribute to the family by arranging the toys, guarding the small brother and various tasks according to his abilities and development.

4. Borders: these are the laws which obligate various members of the family.

According to their age. Borders include, inter alia, a fixed schedule, a fixed hour for sleep and getting up, setting limits for

staying outside the home, and more. All these things create a sense of belonging. A house without borders is a house without "retaining walls" (support) a "liquid" house that cannot contain and provide a sense of security and protection. As we maintain these components, we will be able to make our children feel a part of family belong and be healthy and happy in the family. Without a sense of belonging being a health and satisfying, the family member cannot express the best of it and give the best out of it.

"Who has for what - can stand in any how" (Victor Frenkel) the question arises in what way can a family member be allowed to feel belonging to the family and society in order to reach the maximum capacity and achieve maximum contributions in the family in the society etc? This can be done as you mentioned earlier about involvement, the child should feel useful and contributes. This can be done with the help of the parents, but there are actions that are in the area of adolescent responsibility. Parents can do this through sharing and consultation, open communication, respect for ideas, encouragement, feedback on actions, giving a sense of meaning and a sense of honor.

Sharing and consulting - Interaction between an adolescent and his parents, and respect for adult's ideas.

Encouragement - Feedback on action by emphasizing the positive and investing the effort with the possibility of error and learning from a mistake, focus on ability and encourage action. Sense of meaning - When one considers the opinion of the adolescent, it is treated with respect and a sense of meaning, this makes the adolescent feel an important part of the system and not a small screw without meaning, these actions give the adolescent the feeling of part of the family and increase the sense of responsibility and identification.

In Nathan (means giving in Hebrew) when you look in both directions, you see giving. In other words, when a person gives, he also receives back - giving is acceptance, the reward is to feel helpful and contributing. Benefiting and contributing means responsibility and leads to a sense of value and causes the adolescent to feel good about himself and as a result will be great growth and personal development, the adolescent will be ready to be a "big head" to work hard and succeed in order to achieve success. A sense of usefulness leads to a sense of self-worth which will lead to an activity that will lead to success and happiness, this is a by - product of dynamic action. The sense of belonging means that the person feels part of the family society, creates identification with the family and it gives a feeling of security confidence and optimism in doing. The military concept is a "Unit pride" this is actually belonging, soldiers demonstrate their belonging to the unit through external signs such as symbol, berets in different colors or shirts printed with the symbol of the unit. External signs are only a partial means of increasing the sense of belonging. A sense of good belonging is like an intoxicating and invigorating drug that causes enthusiasm. The strong sense of "togetherness" creates a high motivation for action and success on a personal level and at

the level of the entire organization, thus of course from reaching the high functioning of the adolescent.

The five components to sense of belonging "Conditions of Belonging"

The need to feel useful - Beneficialness and contribution means responsibility and leads to a sense of value and makes the person feel good about himself and as a result will be growth, personal growth and development, People feel valuable all the time, busy doing things and this brings success and happiness. This is the byproduct of dynamic action. Enthusiasm and creativity accompanied by efficiency and contribution. The desire to feel useful is a basic innate need that exists in all cultures.

The need to be valuable - To be equivalent. Motivation to deal with obstacles creates a sense of "I can" "I am able" I feel my value within the family. In the first stage, the child looking for his value through his parents' eyes (the reflection they do to him) so that the value will not remain in the air, it is important that the parents reflect the child's strength and strength in terms of abilities, not just smile, but to express in words (even for a child who is not yet speaking, he perceives the intuition). At a later stage, the very ability of the child to cope with the boundaries that the parents place for him gives him a sense of value like that of adults. Out of the sense of value he learns to direct himself in life.

The need for personal attention - Person must in every situation feel personal attention to his own needs. Since we are different each person has different needs at different levels. A person needs to be listened to, that they know what is talking to him, what helps him, what encourages him, what motivation he is working on. In order for a person to feel personal attention, he must at first experience his own development the experience of separation from mother at the beginning of his development, to know that he is a person in himself, and that his abilities are independent of the parent. When the parent is too protective of the child, the child is swallowed up(absorbed within him) in him and does not have the uniqueness and abilities, all values associated with reciprocity such as compassion, empathy, listening, etc. were born out of the need for personal attention.

The need for a sense of personal meaning - This is the result of a person's worldview, the perception of his functions/roles in his life, out of the need for personal meaning. , it is a philosophical spiritual part, because man needs not only material, what meaning would he have? Identify and empower abilities instead of distractions. A unique fingerprint, each one different, the role of man to take the variance in it and contribute it to society.

Close relationship are needed at all ages because they provide emotional support, help and friendship in a wide range of contexts throughout life, people in every society and in every culture have to establish stable social relationships with others. This need is called "belonging," especially during adolescence. Relations with family and peer groups are important because they play a central and significant role in the development and creation of identity.

Библиографический список

1. Adeler A. Вы и ваша жизнь. Опубликовано Институтом Альфреда Адлера. 1984.

2. Драйкузе Фергюсон А. Введение в теорию Адлера. Опубликовано Институтом Альфреда Адлера. 1995.

3. Драйкузе Р. Основы психологии Адлера. Опубликовано Институтом Альфреда Адлера. 1994.

4. Франкл В. Человек ищет смысл. Бикон пресс-2017.

References

1. Adeler A. You and Your Life. Published by the Alfred Adler Institute. 1984.

2. Draykuse Ferguson A. Introduction to Adlerian Theory. Published by the Alfred Adler Institute. 1995.

3. Draykuse R. The Basics of Adlerian's Psychology. Published by the Alfred Adler Institute. 1994.

4. Frankel V. Man is looking for meaning. Beacon Press, 2017.

Статья поступила в редакцию 07.11.17

УДК 159.97-159.99

Shishkina O.V., Cand. of Sciences (Pedagogy), senior lecturer, Interregional Open Social Institute, senior lecturer, General and Special Psychology and Pedagogy Department (Yoshkar-Ola, Russia), E-mail: [email protected] Rusieva T.M., psychologist, State Institution "Complex Center for Social and Rehabilitation Assistance to the Population", Department of Social and Rehabilitation Care for Minors (Pavlovka, Bashkortostan, Russia), E-mail: [email protected]

DEVELOPMENT OF EMOTIONAL PERCEPTION AND EXPRESSION OF PRESCHOOLERS WITH DELAYED MENTAL DEVELOPMENT. The article reveals a problem of emotional development of a preschool child with a delay in mental development (DMD) in the center of social rehabilitation for minors. The developed and implemented program of psychocorrectional studies for children 5-7 years of age with DMD left without parental care allows realizing the child's rights to social and psychological help and

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