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Effective communication skills in conflict management Ibrayeva E. (Republic of Kazakhstan)
Эффективные коммуникативные навыки в управлении конфликтами Ибраева Э. А. (Республика Казахстан)
Ибраева Эльмира Алпамысовна /Ibrayeva Elmira - доктор исторических наук, магистр экономики, ассоциированный
профессор,
факультет экономики и права,
Международная образовательная корпорация, г. Алматы, Республика Казахстан
Abstract: this paper will study the key personal skills necessary for successful communication and conflict resolution and the role of effective communication skills in managing conflicts. It will discuss the means and benefits of better understanding people and situations through effective communication.
Аннотация: статья изучает ключевые навыки, необходимые для успешного общения и разрешения конфликтов, а также роль эффективных коммуникативных навыков в управлении конфликтами. Обсуждаются преимущества и средства лучшего понимания людей и ситуаций путем эффективного общения. Кофликтология является одной из центральных тем, изучаемых в теории менеджмента.
Keywords: conflict management, communication skills, negotiations, managerial competences.
Ключевые слова: управление конфликтами, коммуникативные навыки, переговоры, управленческие компетенции.
Differing needs and interests of the parties generally cause conflicts. Therefore, such personal skill as empathy is a vital communication skill for conflict resolution, and a key managerial competence for modern business environment. Empathy helps to understand other people’s needs. In Kazakhstan entrepreneurial environment, and also in many other countries, as observed by me, conflicts between customers and front-desk managers handling customers’ problems frequently happen for the only reason of self-esteem of managers and company representatives, for whom winning and fighting for their dignity and status is more important than keeping the customer and solving his problem. In my training workshops on communication skills in Kazakhstan we practiced role-playing games where participants found out that, although their first reaction to arising conflict was struggling, after training empathy skill and the ability to understand the need of the opposite party, they could successfully agree and come to a solution.
Jeanne Segal and Melinda Smith in their article «Conflict resolution skills: building the skills that can turn conflicts into opportunities» discuss how stress can affect one’s ability to be rational in conflict by limiting the abilities to hear what the other party is saying, which is often a real case, and by limiting to understand nonverbal communication of another person. Moreover, what is most important, stress and emotions limit our ability to communicate our ideas and needs clearly. This makes the dialogue very difficult. Thus, Jeanne Segal and Melinda Smith offer some tips for successful conflict resolution, such as making the priority to resolve conflict rather than «be right» and win [1].
I interviewed 25 of my training communication skills workshop participants, small and medium size entrepreneurs from different parts of Kazakhstan, and asked them questions on what were the reasons of their conflicts with customers and partners and what they believed was a good way to solving them. 90 % of them agreed that most of their conflicts with customers was about winning positions psychologically, proving «they are right», and arguing instead of finding a suitable for all parties’ solution.
75 % of all participants interviewed mentioned poor listening and poor hearing was a frequent reason for conflicts and disability to resolve them quickly. People are often self-centered and self-focused in negotiations and conversations and do not hear the needs and wants of others. Moreover, as respondents noted, some people even are not interested much in the others’ needs and wants and do not even think of the necessity of effective listening. Many Western authors devote their papers and books to the art of listening: «One of the most common complaints we hear from peop le engaged in difficult conversations is that the other person won’t listen. And when we hear that our standard advice is ‘You need to spend more time listening to them’. ...The reason the other person is not listening to you is not because they are stubbo rn, but because they don’t feel heard» (D. Stone, B. Patton, S. Heen) [2, p. 166].
Only 10 % of my respondents think that there are always situations, where conflict is inevitable, and there are people with whom it is impossible to negotiate. Especially, in conflicts with customers, they believe there are many difficult customers, and there is no choice except for conflicting with them. While the rest 90 % of respondents interviewed by me agreed that in most cases conflicts can be prevented and resolved quickly and successfully if the person is more skilled in conflict management and in interpersonal communication. This majority part of respondents agreed that by constructive thinking and by productive dialogue there are opportunities to manage conflicts even with the most difficult customers and partners.
Thus, training communication skills can lead to building better relationships with customers, business partners, and many other counterparts. For top-managers it is very important to train their managers for
effective negotiation and conflict management skills, as this is the matter of retaining customers, increasing profits and successful business growth. Training effective communication skills, being a demand for business, became the part of world business schools’ curricula. «We need to pay attention to such peculiarity of the Western system of business education as the flexibility of the curriculum of the university and the ability to quickly adjust the program to the needs of the market and industry» (E. Ibrayeva) [3, p. 77]. There is a growing trend in Kazakhstani education to move to training skills opposed to lecturing and theoretical knowledge transfer in 2000-2015.
Conflicts may arise because of different perceptions, different world visions, that are influenced by culture, traditions, values, way of thinking, systems, regimes, etc. Proactive service and courteous attitude to customer is still a big improvement issue in Kazakhstani business environment, although Kazakhstan business is developing very dynamically and has gone through lots of successful changes. Kazakhstan’s business has a relatively short history - since 1991, collapse of the Soviet Union and transition to market economy. The idea of seeing a manager, serving the customer as a «servant», providing service, rather than a «master», holding a dominant position, which I present at my workshops to Kazakhstani entrepreneurs, is still perceived as unusual perspective to some entrepreneurs, although many experienced business people of Kazakhstan have quite advanced knowledge and skills and agrees on this idea. Thus, research done in the area of developing communication skills will contribute to studies in effective communication and conflict management studies. The results of such studies can be applied for training basic managerial competences, and such training will help to improve customer service and make negotiations more effective, and will help dissolve conflicts in business and other environments. Development of managerial competences and conflict management skills is a strategically important issue for Kazakhstani entrepreneurship and for successful business development in Kazakhstan.
References 1 2 3
1. Jeanne Segal, Melinda Smith. Conflict resolution skills: building the skills that can turn conflicts into
opportunities. HelpGuide.org, 2015. [Electronic resource]. Available at: http:
//www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships/conflict-resolution-skills.htm (date of reference: July 1, 2015).
2. Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen. Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most. New York: Penguin Books, 2000. 166-168 p.
3. Elmira Ibrayeva. Peculiarities of the development of economic education in the Republic of Kazakhstan. // Problems of modern science and education № 6 (36), 2015. M.: Problems of Science, 2015. 76-78 p. / Проблемы современной науки и образования № 6 (36), 2015 М.: Проблемы науки, 2015. 76 -78 с.
